for the men in my life

Sharing what God lays on my heart.

Archive for the tag “sin”

A Spider’s web

Have you ever been stuck in a spider’s web?  Have you ever felt the stickiness, the entanglement…and the more you try to get out the more stuck you feel.  You want to panic because you begin to feel overwhelmed, trapt, stuck, and hopeless.

Spider web

Spider web (Photo credit: Marcelo Tourne)

Sin can be like a spider’s web.  It can catch you completely off guard.  You can get stuck in way over your head before you even know what is going on.  I can describe this so well because I have been there.  With more than one type of sin.

The sin I want to talk about today comes from manipulation.  Specifically emotional manipulation.  Let me be very clear, it is not good.  Using emotional manipulation does not bring Glory to God.

I know that I am no saint.  I am not going to sit here and write that I have never tried to manipulate someone or some facts.  I will say that I have learned it does not benefit me or the person I was manipulating.  God has helped me and is continuing to help me use honest forms of communication for His glory.

I am still stuck in a spider’s web though.  Its not one I have created, but it is one I have allowed to be created around me.  Lately it seems around every corner God is putting people in my life that have been emotionally manipulating me or verbally jabbing me.  I feel caught in their negative, disgusting, and sinful attitudes.  I have yet to learn how to verbally cut their strings before they attach to me.  I walk away from conversations feeling yucky and emotionally entangled.  I literally want to rip something off of me.   I think about what I could have said and what I should have done to make them stop.

I know, I know…I wrote a post not so long ago about how bold I am and unafraid I am to speak my mind.  Well the truth is…when it comes to people I know, love, or work with, I want to please them, make them proud, or win their approval…I kind of don’t know how to tell them no, or that I disagree, or that I don’t really want to do what they are suggesting.  I am a people pleaser…its my kryptonite.

Back to emotional manipulation…So after talking with a Godly mentor and dear friend who have great boundaries and much more life experience I have learned some new phrases.  I need to learn to use these phrases with love and cut through the spider’s web.

“What did you mean by that?”

“I can’t answer that right now.”

“I am not prepared to have this conversation right now, can I call you tomorrow after I have prayed and thought about it.”

Any version of the above delivered with a smile and sweet tone should surely help me not get entangled, but also not offend the person seeking something from me.

I have been brewing this post for some months now.  This morning I knew it was going to be done steeping.  When I sat down to pray and read my verse for the day I knew God wanted to deal with this topic tonight.

The verse was this…”(from the message) Right now, therefore, every time we get the chance, let us work for the benefit of all, starting with the people closest to us in the community of faith.” Galatians 6:10.

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The Light

Beam Of Light

Beam Of Light (Photo credit: karma-police)

I have been focusing on scriptures with reference to light and God being the source of all light.  The reason being our church started a segment called “Servant Spotlight” once a month to highlight a ministry in our church.  I came across a great one today.
1John 1:7 “But if we walk in the light, God himself being the light, we also experience a shared life with one another, as the sacrificed blood of Jesus, God’s Son, purges all our sin.”

That verse caught me today. It intrigued me and pulled me in. I wanted to know what preceded the word but. That little word can do many things. According to my husband it can nullify an apology.
So I started digging and went to the source. I looked up the full chapter of 1John. I think the bible says it best so I will just paste it for you here. This is from The Message 1John1:5-10

“This, in essence, is the message we heard from Christ and are passing on to you: God is light, pure light; there’s not a trace of darkness in him.
6-7If we claim that we experience a shared life with him and continue to stumble around in the dark, we’re obviously lying through our teeth—we’re not living what we claim. But if we walk in the light, God himself being the light, we also experience a shared life with one another, as the sacrificed blood of Jesus, God’s Son, purges all our sin.
8-10If we claim that we’re free of sin, we’re only fooling ourselves. A claim like that is errant nonsense. On the other hand, if we admit our sins—make a clean break of them—he won’t let us down; he’ll be true to himself. He’ll forgive our sins and purge us of all wrongdoing. If we claim that we’ve never sinned, we out-and-out contradict God—make a liar out of him. A claim like that only shows off our ignorance of God.”

I read that and I am humbled. It is a call to constantly put oneself under the blood of Christ. There is nothing in myself that is good. The only Good in me is Christ. When I try to do things even in my own good intentions, without Christ becomes a giant mess. I must submit all of myself, my talents, my thoughts, my motives, my feelings, my words under the blood of Christ. I must let Him purify me before I move out into this world and attempt to show love, compassion, or grace.  I do not want to stumble around in darkness.  I would much rather see with God’s perfect clarity living in His great Light.

But it doesn’t stop there.  Just like in the picture above, the beam of light reaching down into the depths of a cave, God promises to redeem us.  We are never so far entangled in sin that His Light can not conquer the darkness within us.  All we have to do is surrender to him and acknowledge our need for Him and He is mighty to save.  I am thankful that I serve such a Big God.  He can clean up the messes I make tirelessly and still fill me with His grace.  He brings glory to himself while restoring my soul.  There is such peace in His light.

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for the men in my life

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